Thursday, February 26, 2009

Is it creativity or is it crack?

It's kids like this one that actually make poppin' one out seem like an OK idea.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Who's a good Slumdog Millionaire? Yesh you are, oh yesh you are!

Who's da Bestest Picture of da year? Isyou, isyou, isyou, isyou, isyou! Would you like anothah tweat? You would?! Of course you would, of course you would! Who's da best at cinematogwaphy, diwecting and editing? Is it... Slumdog? Yesh it's Slumdog! And who has da bestest owiginal score and bestest owiginal song? ... It's Slumdog!! What a good picture, good film! And who's got da bestest Sound in da whole wide entertainment industwy? Isyou, isyou, isyou! Oh, what's dat, Slumdog? Am I forgetting somesing? Oh, how siwwy of me, who's da bestest at wighting in da categowy of scweenplay based on matewial pweviously pwoduced or pubwished? Whadda good Slumdog!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Tom Hanks to Blow Up World

Despite years of playing heroic figures onscreen in hits such as Road to Perdition, Saving Private Ryan, The Da Vinci Code, Apollo 13, Philadelphia and Splash, Tom Hanks has recently announced his intention to destroy the world and potentially other large chunks of the universe by turning on the Large Hadron Collider operated by CERN near Geneva when repairs have been completed. He then immediately apologized for exposing the LHC's nearly limitless destructive power to the world before confirming the existence of such abilities with the LHC first.

In related news, Kevin Kline has signed on for a new romantic comedy to be directed by Frank Oz, tentatively entitled Machine Designed to Simulate the Big Bang & Evil Underground Scientific Lair That Will Create Black Holes Destroying the Earth and Its Surroundings (Paramount Pics).

Times Are Tough

It's true. But in trying episodes such as these, it is absolutely imperative that we all take a moment to remember that this happened and was amazing.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Valentine's Day: Some Advice

Don't be the asshole who sticks his tongue out before the kiss starts.

Also, get her a puppy or she'll probably dump you.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.

The beauty of blogging

Is that if you remember a really great and applicable word exists weeks after writing an entry, you can go back and plug it right in. You can then blog about how great it was that you were able to transcend time like that, how you were able to travel back to a moment where you went, "OK, 'christened' will do," and say to yourself, "No! You will not settle! You will reflect and find the perfect word, that ideal thing that will capture the very essence of what you mean to express in a concise collection of sounds!"